A respectful place to talk through questions about sexuality, intimacy, relationships, and gender, at a pace you set. Registered Psychologists regulated by the College of Alberta Psychologists (CAP). In-person sessions in Edmonton and St. Albert. Virtual sessions available across Alberta. 50-minute sessions, with appointments available seven days a week.

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You Might Be Wondering Whether Sexuality, Intimacy and Gender Counselling Is Right for You

You may not be sure your questions are serious enough for counselling. Maybe nothing feels wrong, exactly. You might be wondering whether it makes sense to talk to a stranger about something as personal as desire, attraction, or gender, or whether you need to have it all figured out before you walk in. You might also worry that a therapist will judge you or try to tell you who you are.

Perhaps you and a partner have stopped talking about intimacy because every attempt ends in hurt or silence. Perhaps you keep turning over questions about who you are drawn to, or how you relate to your gender, with nowhere to say them out loud. Or you might be carrying a quiet tiredness from editing yourself around family, friends, or coworkers. These experiences make sense.

Sexuality, intimacy, and gender are tied up with culture, faith, family, health, and safety, so questions about them can feel tangled and heavy. Feeling unsure, or holding two feelings at once, does not mean something is wrong with you.

If you are weighing whether talking with someone could help, you may wish to read on. The sections below describe what this counselling involves, who it suits, and how it works. You can take what is useful and leave the rest.

Who We Help

Not everyone who comes to this kind of counselling is in distress. Some people want room to think. Others are dealing with a change in a relationship, a question about identity, or a gap between what they want and what they feel able to say.

This service may be a good fit if you are:

• Exploring questions about sexual orientation, attraction, or how you describe yourself
• Thinking about your gender identity or gender expression, including if you are unsure or early in that process
• Dealing with changes in intimacy or desire, or finding it hard to talk with a partner about needs, preferences, and boundaries
• Working through relationship agreements or differences in comfort and expectations
• Feeling tension between your identity and your culture, faith, or family expectations
• Preparing for a conversation with a partner, family member, or health-care provider, including coming out
• A partner, parent, or family member who wants support with someone else's identity or a change in your relationship

Related pages you may find useful include LGBTQ2S+ Therapy, Gender Identity Counselling, Sexuality and Intimacy Therapy, and Coming Out Counselling.

This service may not be the right fit if you need:

• Immediate safety or crisis support. Please use the crisis resources below.
• Medical care. Counselling does not include medical assessment, medication, or medical gender-affirming care. A family physician or other health-care provider is the right place for those needs.
• Forensic or legal services. Court reports, custody evaluations, and legal advice are outside this therapy service. Psychological assessments are a separate service.
• Specialized programs for people who have caused sexual harm, or court-mandated treatment. These are outside this service. The admin team can talk with you about other options.
• Help changing your sexual orientation or gender identity. This counselling does not aim to change who you are.

If past sexual harm is part of what you are carrying, you may also wish to read about Sexual Abuse and Assault Support.

If You Need Help Right Now

Counselling is not crisis care. If you or someone else is in danger, or you are worried about your safety tonight, please reach out to one of these services:

• 911 for immediate danger, or go to the nearest emergency department
• Alberta Mental Health Help Line: 1-877-303-2642 (24/7)
• Family Violence Info Line (Alberta): 310-1818 (24/7, toll-free)
• 9-8-8 Suicide Crisis Helpline: call or text 988 (24/7)

Wholesome Psychology is not an emergency or crisis service.

What Sexuality, Intimacy and Gender Counselling Is

This is talk therapy for questions about sexual orientation, attraction, desire, intimacy, relationships, gender identity, and gender expression. It can give you a structured space to understand what you are experiencing, think through choices, and plan conversations that feel hard to start. Most people attend on their own. Sessions with a partner or partners may be possible when everyone agrees and it fits the therapist's scope.

It helps to know what this service is not:

• It is not a legal service, an investigative process, or crisis intervention.
• It is not a psychological assessment. Counselling does not include formal testing or diagnosis, and assessments are offered as a separate service.
• It is not medical care. Your therapist will not prescribe or manage medication or provide medical gender-affirming care, though counselling can help you prepare questions for a health-care provider.
• It is not a place where someone else decides your identity, label, or relationship for you.

You set the pace. You can slow down, change the focus, or take a break at any point. What you discuss is confidential within legal limits, which are explained below and again in your first session. Each clinician works within their own training and scope of practice, and if your needs fall outside it, they can talk with you about other options.

Signs Questions About Sexuality, Intimacy or Gender May Be Affecting You

These are patterns people often describe. You do not need to recognize all of them, or any of them, to benefit from a conversation.

• Feeling distant from a partner, or unsure how to say what you want or do not want
• Avoiding intimacy, or going along with it while feeling far away
• Turning over questions about attraction, orientation, or gender until you feel stuck or worn out
• Worrying about how family, friends, a faith community, or coworkers might react
• Feeling pulled between your values or upbringing and what you actually experience
• Shame or harsh self-talk about your body, your desires, or past experiences
• Changes in desire or comfort after stress, a health change, a new baby, or another life transition
• Tension in your body, trouble sleeping, or a knot in your stomach before intimate moments or hard conversations
• Hiding parts of yourself, and the tiredness that comes with it

If you notice physical changes such as pain or changes in sexual function, it is worth seeing a physician alongside any counselling. Medical concerns sit outside what a therapist can assess.

Responses like these are understandable reactions to pressure, uncertainty, or a relationship that has changed. They are not fixed parts of who you are, and they do not mean your identity or desires are a problem. Structured support may help you sort out what is going on and what you want to do next.

How Counselling Works Here

• Find your therapist. Use the Match with a Therapist tool or browse Our Therapists. If you would like help choosing, call the admin team at 780-904-4880. You are welcome to ask whether a clinician has experience with the concerns you want to bring.
• Book your first session. You can book through our online booking system. In the first session, your therapist reviews confidentiality and its limits, explains consent, and asks what you hope to get from counselling. You can ask questions too, about their approach, their experience, or how sessions work.
• Build your plan together. You and your therapist shape a plan around your goals. A goal can be broad, like understanding yourself better, or specific, like talking with a partner about differences in desire.
• Ongoing sessions. Sessions are 50 minutes, usually weekly or every two weeks, and the frequency can change as needed. You can attend in person or virtually.
• Progress check-ins. Your therapist checks in regularly about what is helping and what is not. The plan can shift as your needs and questions change.

There is no fixed number of sessions. Counselling is collaborative, and your voice matters at every stage. To learn more about the process, see Getting Started with Therapy.

Evidence and Approaches

We try to be clear about what research does and does not tell us. The evidence gathered for this page is limited. It does not yet include outcome studies of specific therapy methods for sexuality, intimacy, or gender concerns, so this section does not rank techniques or suggest that any one method will work for you.

What we can describe is how counselling here is meant to work: collaboratively, with your goals shaping the focus. Depending on your goals and your therapist's training, sessions may focus on understanding patterns, strengthening communication, considering boundaries, making room for emotions, or exploring practical next steps.

Support for Sexual and Gender Minority Stress

What it helps with: This kind of support focuses on stress that can build up from stigma, rejection, or feeling you have to hide your sexual orientation or gender identity.

Evidence summary: A systematic review and meta-analysis has examined interventions designed to address sexual and gender minority stress ("A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis of Interventions," n.d.). The review's findings were not available in the material gathered for this page. For that reason, we make no claims here about how well these interventions work.

Limitations: Without the findings, the strength and consistency of this evidence cannot be described. Results from research groups also may not match any one person's experience.

Canadian and International Context

Classification systems have changed over time. In the World Health Organization's ICD-11, gender incongruence is listed in the chapter on conditions related to sexual health, not in the chapter on mental, behavioural or neurodevelopmental disorders (World Health Organization [WHO], n.d.). Counselling here does not start from the idea that your gender identity needs to be diagnosed or treated.

In Canada, Statistics Canada has used 2017-2018 Canadian Community Health Survey data to look at self-reported health and day-to-day functioning among lesbian, gay and bisexual adults (Statistics Canada, 2023). Population research like this describes groups, not individuals. It does not tell us what any one person needs.

The Government of Canada also publishes public information on gender-affirming care options (Government of Canada, n.d.). Medical gender-affirming care is outside the scope of this counselling service. Counselling can, however, be a place to sort through your questions and prepare for conversations with a health-care provider.

What Results to Expect

Progress with these questions is rarely a straight line. Some weeks bring clarity, and others bring new questions. That is part of the process, not a sign that it is failing.

There is no set timeline. Some people come for 2-3 sessions to talk through one specific question or prepare for a single conversation. Some notice shifts within a few months. Others find longer-term work more useful, especially when questions touch identity, family, faith, or a long relationship.

Several things can shape your experience:

• What you are hoping to explore, and how long it has been on your mind
• Your current circumstances, such as your relationship, living situation, stress, and support
• Whether a partner or family member is involved in sessions
• How well you and your therapist fit

No therapy can guarantee a particular outcome. Counselling will not hand you a label or decide your relationship for you. It may help you get clearer on what matters to you and what you want to try next. If the fit with your therapist or approach does not feel right, changing either one is always an option.

Confidentiality and Privacy

What you share in counselling is confidential, within the limits set by law and professional standards. That includes details about your sexuality, your relationships, and your gender identity. Your therapist will not share this with family members, partners, employers, or anyone else without your consent, except in the situations listed below.

Psychologists at Wholesome Psychology are regulated by the College of Alberta Psychologists (CAP) and follow the Canadian Psychological Association (CPA) Canadian Code of Ethics for Psychologists. Depending on the setting, Alberta's Health Information Act (HIA) and Personal Information Protection Act (PIPA) set rules for how your personal and health information is collected, used, stored, and shared.

There are legal exceptions to confidentiality. Your therapist may need to share information:

• If there is a risk of serious harm to you or someone else
• If there is reason to suspect a child is being abused or neglected, since reporting is mandatory under Alberta law
• If a court orders records or testimony

Your therapist will explain these limits clearly during your first session. You can ask questions about privacy, record keeping, or virtual sessions before you share anything personal. If you attend with a partner, your therapist will also explain how information from individual and joint sessions is handled.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do I have to describe what happened, or every detail of my private life?

No. You decide what to share and when. Some people start with something in the present, like a recurring argument or a decision they are weighing, and never go into detailed history. Your therapist may ask questions to understand what you want help with, but you can say you are not ready to talk about something at any point.

Is what I share kept private?

Yes, within legal limits. Your therapist will not share your sexual orientation, gender identity, or anything else you discuss without your consent, except where there is a risk of serious harm, a suspicion that a child is being abused or neglected, or a court order. You can read more in the Confidentiality and Privacy section above, and your therapist will go over these limits in your first session.

How many sessions will I need?

There is no fixed answer. Some people come for a few sessions to work through a specific question. Others prefer longer-term support. You and your therapist review progress regularly and adjust the plan together, including how often you meet.

What if the therapist is not the right fit?

Fit matters, especially when you are talking about something this personal. If a therapist does not feel right, you can tell them, or contact the admin team at 780-904-4880 to find a different clinician. New clients may access their first session at 50% off to help find the right therapeutic fit.

Can I access therapy online?

Yes. Virtual sessions are available anywhere in Alberta, and the same confidentiality standards apply. If you live with others, it can help to plan a private spot and use headphones. You can learn more on our Online Counselling page.

Will a therapist try to change me or tell me who I am?

No. Counselling here is not about deciding what your identity, orientation, or relationship should look like. You do not need to arrive with a label or a clear goal. Your therapist can help you explore questions and think through choices, and the decisions stay yours.

Can I come about a partner's or family member's identity, or come together?

Yes, you can come on your own to talk about how someone else's identity, or a change in your relationship, is affecting you. Joint sessions with a partner or family member may also be possible, depending on everyone's consent, your goals, and the therapist's scope. Mention this when you contact the admin team so they can point you toward suitable options. You may also wish to read about Couples Counselling.

What if I am not safe at home or in my relationship?

Your safety comes first. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. The Family Violence Info Line (310-1818) and the Alberta Mental Health Help Line (1-877-303-2642) are available 24/7. Counselling can still be an option while you sort out next steps, and when you get in touch you can mention any concerns about how you are contacted. Our Family Violence Counselling page has more information.

Meet Your Clinicians

Wholesome Psychology's team includes Registered Psychologists, Registered Provisional Psychologists, Registered Social Workers, Canadian Certified Counsellors, Mental Health Therapists, and Student Therapists. All psychologists are registered with the College of Alberta Psychologists. Registered Provisional Psychologists practise under the supervision of a senior registered psychologist, and Registered Social Workers are regulated by the Alberta College of Social Workers (ACSW).

Training and areas of focus vary from one clinician to the next, and not every clinician works with sexuality, intimacy, or gender concerns. Individual profiles on Our Therapists describe each clinician's experience. The Match with a Therapist tool can help you narrow your options, and the admin team at 780-904-4880 can help you ask about a clinician's experience and scope before you book.

Children and Youth

Young people can have questions about identity, attraction, and relationships too, and so can the adults who care about them. Wholesome Psychology offers counselling for children, adolescents, and young people. Therapists who work with younger clients use age-appropriate approaches.

Counselling with a young person does not push them toward or away from any identity. The focus is on listening and making room for their own questions. Where appropriate, clinicians also work with parents and caregivers to support the young person at home, and caregivers can have their own sessions to talk through questions and feelings.

Your therapist will explain how consent and confidentiality work for a young person, including what may and may not be shared with caregivers. To learn more, see Child and Youth Counselling and Supporting LGBTQ Youth.

If You Would Like to Take a Next Step

You can start in whatever way feels manageable. Some people like to read more first. Others prefer to talk with someone on the admin team.

• Book a session online
• Match with a therapist
• Call 780-904-4880
• Email info@wholesomepsychology.ca
• Read Getting Started with Therapy

You do not need the right words, or a finished question. Starting the conversation is enough.

New clients may access their first session at 50% off to help find the right therapeutic fit.

References

• Government of Canada. (n.d.). Gender-affirming care: Options.
• Statistics Canada. (2023). Functional health difficulties among lesbian, gay and bisexual people in Canada.
• A systematic review and meta-analysis of interventions addressing sexual and gender minority stress. (n.d.).
• World Health Organization. (n.d.). ICD-11 for mortality and morbidity statistics.