A structured way for two people to look at how their relationship is going, and to decide together what, if anything, comes next. Delivered by regulated clinicians, including Registered Psychologists registered with the College of Alberta Psychologists (CAP). Available in person at five Edmonton and St. Albert locations, and virtually across Alberta. 50-minute sessions, evenings and weekends included. Practice governed by CAP Standards of Practice and the Canadian Psychological Association (CPA) Canadian Code of Ethics for Psychologists.

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You Might Be Wondering Whether a Relationship Checkup Is Right for You

You may be unsure whether things are bad enough to involve a professional. Maybe nothing dramatic has happened. Maybe you worry that booking something called a checkup is the same as announcing that the relationship is in trouble, and you are not ready to say that out loud, even to yourself.

Some of what brings people to this page is quiet. One of you raises something, the other goes quiet, and the conversation ends without ever being finished. You are perfectly polite with each other and something still feels far away. You catch yourself editing a sentence before you say it, then deciding not to say it at all.

Patterns like these build slowly, and usually nobody set out to create them. Conflict is a normal part of being a couple, and what tends to matter more is how it gets handled (Canadian Psychological Association [CPA], 2021). Noticing a pattern is not a verdict on your relationship, and it is not a sign that either of you has failed at something.

You may wish to keep reading and see what a checkup actually involves before deciding whether it fits your situation.

Who We Help

A relationship checkup may be a reasonable fit if:

• You are both curious about where the relationship stands and want a structured way to look at it
• You keep circling the same disagreement and want help naming what it is really about
• You are going through a transition, such as a new baby, a move, a job change, illness, or a blended family arrangement
• Things are reasonably good and you want to attend to the relationship before problems set in
• You are considering couples counselling and want a starting point before committing to ongoing work
• You are gathering information for a partner, an adult child, or a friend and want to understand what the process involves

This service may not be the right fit if:

• You are in crisis or in immediate danger. Please use the resources below rather than waiting for an appointment.
• You need something for a legal or court process. Therapy is not a legal service or an investigative process. Court-related evaluations, including parenting time and parenting responsibilities assessments, are a separate kind of work with different rules, and they are not part of this service.
• You need a psychological assessment or a diagnosis. Psychological assessments are a separate service at this clinic with their own intake process. A relationship checkup does not produce a diagnosis.
• One partner is being pressured into attending. Participation needs to be voluntary for both people.
• There is ongoing violence, fear, or coercive control in the relationship. Joint sessions can be unsafe in these circumstances. Individual support is usually the safer starting point, and the admin team can help you find it.

If You Need Help Right Now

Wholesome Psychology books appointments in advance and does not monitor calls or messages around the clock. If you are worried about your immediate safety or someone else's, please use one of these instead.

• 911 or your nearest emergency department, if there is immediate danger
• Alberta Mental Health Help Line: 1-877-303-2642 (24/7)
• Family Violence Info Line (Alberta): 310-1818 (24/7, toll-free, over 170 languages)
• Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741

Wholesome Psychology is not an emergency or crisis service.

What This Service Is

A relationship checkup is a structured conversation about how a relationship is going. It usually pairs a set of questions, answered by each partner, with a feedback session where a clinician walks you both through what came back and what stood out. The point is not to decide who is right. The point is to get the pattern out of your heads and onto the table where you can both look at it.

It helps to be clear about what this is not. A checkup is not a psychological assessment and it does not produce a diagnosis. It is not a legal service, an investigation, or a crisis intervention. It is not a prediction about whether your relationship will last, and no clinician can offer you one. It is also not a verdict delivered to you: the feedback is a starting point for a conversation you lead.

You set the pace. You decide what to raise and what to leave alone, and you can stop at any point. What you share stays confidential within the limits set by law and professional standards, which your clinician will go through with you at the start. A fuller explanation appears further down this page.

Clinicians here work within their areas of training and registration. If something comes up that sits outside what your clinician does, they will tell you and help you find the right service.

Signs Relationship Distress May Be Affecting You

These are experiences people often describe when they book. They are not diagnostic criteria, and you do not need to recognise all of them.

• The same argument keeps returning in slightly different clothing and never fully resolves
• One person raises concerns and criticises, the other withdraws and says less and less
• You have started avoiding certain subjects entirely, and the list of subjects keeps growing
• Affection or physical closeness has thinned out, or feels complicated to initiate
• You feel lonely in the room with the person you live with
• Ordinary stress, such as money, work, a new baby, or a family illness, now sets off much bigger conflict than it used to
• You feel keyed up before conversations, or notice poor sleep, tension, or low mood that tracks with how things are at home
• You have found yourself imagining life apart, without being sure whether you mean it

The pattern where one partner criticises and the other withdraws is common in distressed relationships and tends to intensify over time, and avoiding conflict altogether carries its own cost as partners become more disengaged (CPA, 2021). Recognising yourself in this list does not mean something is permanently wrong with either of you or with the relationship. These are common responses to strain, and they are the kind of thing structured support is designed to work with.

How This Works Here

• Find your clinician. Use the Match with a Therapist tool or read through Our Therapists. If you would rather talk it through, the admin team can be reached at 780-904-4880 and can tell you who currently works with couples and who is accepting new clients.
• Book a first session. The first appointment covers consent, how confidentiality works when two people are in the room, and what each of you is hoping to get out of the process. You will also confirm the exact format, including which questionnaires are used and whether they are completed separately.
• Work through the feedback together. Your clinician organises what came back into themes and goes through it with both of you, checking as they go whether it matches your experience.
• Decide what comes next, together. That might be couples counselling, individual support for one or both of you, another conversation later, or nothing further for now. Any plan is built with you, not handed to you.
• Review as you go. If you continue, sessions run 50 minutes, usually weekly or every second week, and the schedule is adjusted to suit you. Your clinician revisits goals regularly so the work can change direction when your needs do.

There is no fixed number of sessions, and continuing is always a decision you make rather than a default you fall into.

Evidence and Approaches

The research below concerns the general approaches, not any promise about your relationship. Availability of a specific approach depends on your clinician's training.

Structured Relationship Checkup

What it helps with: Getting a clear, shared picture of where a relationship stands and what each partner wants to talk about.

Evidence summary: A meta-analysis of 12 randomized trials published between 1995 and 2015 examined couple checkups, which pair a structured assessment with a feedback conversation (Fentz & Trillingsgaard, 2017). It reported small average improvements in relationship functioning at the end of the process and again at six-month follow-up. Therapist-guided and self-directed formats produced broadly similar results.

Limitations: The average effects were small, and follow-up reached only about six months. The authors noted that effects on individual mental health, and the value of repeating a checkup, need further research.

Emotion-Focused Couple Therapy (EFT)

What it helps with: Reaching the unmet emotional needs sitting underneath repeated arguments and growing distance.

Evidence summary: CPA lists emotion-focused couple therapy among three psychological treatments described as helping distressed couples (CPA, 2021). Rather than problem-solving first, the therapist helps each partner put words to what they need from the other. A couples counselling resource from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health [CAMH] also identifies this approach (CAMH, 2023).

Limitations: Both sources here are Canadian public education materials rather than systematic reviews, so they describe the approach without reporting effect sizes or comparing it directly against other couple therapies.

Cognitive Behavioural Couple Therapy and Behavioural Marital Therapy

What it helps with: Changing the communication and problem-solving habits that keep the same conflict cycling.

Evidence summary: CPA describes behavioural marital therapy and cognitive behavioural couple therapy as approaches that help couples communicate more effectively and resolve conflicts (CPA, 2021). It reports that clinical trials of these therapies find most couples feel more satisfied with their relationship by the end of treatment, with some studies showing gains still present two years later.

Limitations: This account comes from a professional body's public fact sheet rather than a systematic review, and it does not report how large the average change is or how many couples do not improve.

Discernment Counselling

What it helps with: Working out whether to invest in the relationship or move toward separating, when the two of you are not in the same place about it.

Evidence summary: CPA describes discernment counselling as a brief intervention that helps couples decide whether to take steps toward divorce or to commit to working on the relationship for a set period (CPA, 2021). It is framed as a decision-making process rather than a course of couple therapy.

Limitations: The available source explains what this approach is for without reporting outcome data, so how well it works, and for whom, is not established by the sources used on this page.

What Results to Expect

Change in relationships is rarely a straight line. Some weeks feel clearer, some weeks feel like going backwards, and both are ordinary. Some people find relief from just 2-3 sessions, particularly when the goal is to understand a pattern rather than to rebuild something after a serious rupture. Others find that longer work suits their situation better.

Several things influence how a process like this goes: how long a pattern has been running, what else is happening in your lives, whether both partners want to be there, and how well you both connect with the clinician. Research on couple checkups reports small average improvements rather than dramatic change, and those findings describe groups of couples, not any individual couple (Fentz & Trillingsgaard, 2017).

No therapy guarantees an outcome, and nobody here will tell you what your relationship will look like in a year. Fit with your clinician matters, and changing clinician or approach is always available to you. Saying that something is not working is useful information rather than a setback.

Confidentiality and Privacy

What you share is treated as confidential. Psychologists at Wholesome Psychology are registered with the College of Alberta Psychologists (CAP) and practise under the CAP Standards of Practice and the Canadian Psychological Association (CPA) Canadian Code of Ethics for Psychologists, both of which set out obligations around privacy and informed consent.

Two pieces of Alberta legislation are relevant. The Personal Information Protection Act (PIPA) sets the rules for how private organisations in Alberta, including private psychology clinics, collect, use, disclose, and retain personal information. The Health Information Act (HIA) governs health information held by custodians such as Alberta Health Services and hospitals, which becomes relevant if you ask for information to be shared with a public health provider. Your clinician can tell you which applies to a specific request.

There are limits to confidentiality. Information may be disclosed without your consent when:

• There are reasonable grounds to believe disclosure is necessary to prevent imminent and grave harm to you, to another person, or to public safety
• There is suspected abuse or neglect of a child, which carries a mandatory reporting duty under Alberta law
• A court order or another legal requirement compels disclosure

Couples work adds one more consideration. Because two people are in the room, your clinician will explain at the outset how information shared by one partner is handled, how the file is kept, and what happens if one of you contacts them separately. Ask about this before you share anything you would not want repeated.

For virtual appointments, privacy also depends on things outside the clinic's control: your device, your internet connection, where you are sitting, and who might be within earshot. Choose a private space where you can, and raise any concerns with your clinician.

You are welcome to ask questions about any of this before disclosing anything personal.

Common Questions

Do we have to go through everything that has gone wrong?

No. You decide what to raise and how much detail to give. A checkup is oriented toward present-day patterns, such as how conversations tend to unfold between you, rather than toward a full account of past events. If a topic feels like too much on a given day, say so and your clinician will work with that. Nobody will press you to disclose something you are not ready to say in front of your partner.

Is what we say kept private?

Yes, within limits. Clinicians are bound by CAP Standards of Practice and by Alberta privacy legislation. The exceptions are risk of imminent and grave harm, suspected abuse or neglect of a child, and court orders or other legal requirements. Because couples work involves two people, your clinician will also explain at the start how information from each of you is handled. The confidentiality section above sets this out in more detail.

How many sessions will this take?

There is no fixed number. Some couples do a checkup as a short, self-contained process and stop there. Others use it as an entry point into ongoing counselling. Your clinician reviews progress with you regularly, and continuing is always a choice rather than an assumption.

What if the clinician is not the right fit?

Fit has a real effect on how useful therapy is, and it is not always clear until you have met. If someone is not right for you, tell the admin team at 780-904-4880 and they can help you move to a different clinician without you having to explain yourself at length. New clients may access their first session at 50% off to help find the right therapeutic fit. The Match with a Therapist tool can also narrow the options before you book.

Can we do this online?

Yes. Virtual appointments are available across Alberta and are held to the same confidentiality standards as in-person sessions. Some couples join from the same room, others from separate locations. Privacy in a virtual session also depends on your own space and devices, so pick somewhere you will not be overheard.

What if my partner will not come?

A checkup is built around both partners taking part, so it is not usually run with one person. That said, individual counselling to think through your own situation is available, and plenty of people start there. The admin team can talk through the options with you.

What if there is fear, violence, or control in our relationship?

Joint sessions are not usually safe or appropriate when one partner is afraid of the other, and being asked to speak openly in a shared session can increase risk. If this describes your situation, individual support is the safer place to begin. The Family Violence Info Line (310-1818) is available 24/7 and can talk through options with you confidentially, and the clinic offers separate family violence counselling. If you are in immediate danger, call 911.

Is this a psychological assessment or a diagnosis?

No. A relationship checkup is a structured conversation supported by questionnaires, not a psychological assessment, and it does not result in a diagnosis for either partner. Psychological assessments are a separate service with a different process, cost, and time commitment. If an assessment seems like the right next step, your clinician can explain how that referral works. Relationship problems are recognised as a legitimate reason to seek health services, including relationship distress with a spouse or partner (World Health Organization [WHO], 2025), which is a different matter from receiving a diagnosis.

Meet Your Clinicians

The clinical team includes Registered Psychologists, Registered Provisional Psychologists, Registered Social Workers, Certified Canadian Counsellors, Mental Health Therapists, and Student Therapists. All psychologists are registered with the College of Alberta Psychologists, and Registered Provisional Psychologists practise under the supervision of a senior Registered Psychologist. These designations correspond to the fee tiers listed above.

Many clinicians here have training in couples and relationship work, including approaches such as the Gottman method and emotion-focused therapy, along with related areas including communication, intimacy, infidelity, separation, and family transitions. Training and areas of focus vary between clinicians, so it is worth checking a profile or asking the admin team before booking.

Individual profiles are on the Our Therapists page, and the Match with a Therapist tool can help narrow the list. The admin team is available at 780-904-4880 if you would rather ask a person. The Getting Started with Therapy page walks through what to expect.

Children and Young People

Conflict between parents does not stay between parents. Children who repeatedly witness conflict between the adults raising them are at greater risk of emotional and behavioural difficulties (CPA, 2021). That is not said to add guilt to an already difficult situation. It is said because it is often the reason parents decide to look at the relationship in the first place.

The clinic offers counselling for children, adolescents, and young people. Clinicians working with younger clients use approaches suited to a child's age and stage, which for younger children often means play and activity rather than sitting and talking. They also work with caregivers, since a child's recovery usually depends on what is happening around them as much as on the sessions themselves.

If you are separating or already separated, support around separation and divorce is also available for adults and for children adjusting to the change.

Where to Go From Here

If a relationship checkup sounds like something you and your partner might use, here are the ways in:

• Book a session online
• Match with a therapist
• Call 780-904-4880 to talk through options with the admin team
• Email info@wholesomepsychology.ca
• Read the Getting Started with Therapy page
• Related services: couples counselling, Gottman couples therapy, emotionally focused therapy, marriage and relationship concerns, communication and negotiation, premarital counselling

New clients may access their first session at 50% off to help find the right therapeutic fit.

You do not have to arrive knowing what you want from this. Starting the conversation is enough.

References

• Canadian Psychological Association. (2021). "Psychology Works" fact sheet: Relationship distress.
• Centre for Addiction and Mental Health. (2023). Couples counselling: Where to go when you're looking for help.
• Fentz, H. N., & Trillingsgaard, T. (2017). Checking up on couples: A meta-analysis of the effect of assessment and feedback on marital functioning and individual mental health in couples. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 43(1), 31-50. https://doi.org/10.1111/jmft.12185
• World Health Organization. (2025). ICD-11 for mortality and morbidity statistics (Version 2025-01): QE51 Problem associated with interactions with spouse or partner. http://id.who.int/icd/entity/396951882